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By Jacob Stolworthy | The Independent | April 6, 2025
Barack Obama has shared a candid revelation about his marriage to Michelle Obama.
The former US president opened up about the state of his relationship to Michelle while “speaking publicly” for “the first time in a while” during a talk at Hamilton College on Thursday (3 April).
While Barack, 63, shared his negative views on Trump’s presidency, and rebuked his tariff announcement, he also admitted that he has been in what he called “a deep deficit with my wife”.
In the past, Barack has hinted that his presidency affected his marriage to Michelle, 61, stating: “It sure helps to be out of the White House.”
The Daily Beast now reports that Obama told Steven Tepper, the president of Hamilton College, that he has been actively trying to spend more time with Michelle, to whom he has been married for 32 years, as life increasingly gets in the way.
“I’ve been trying to dig myself out of that hole by doing occasionally fun things,” he candidly told Tepper.
Michelle previously opened up about her marriage during an interview with Revolt TV, in which she said of the effort her and her husband put in: “There are times I’m 70, he’s 30. There are times he’s 60, I’m 40.”
She also said “there were 10 years” where she “couldn’t stand” Barack but added: “I would take 10 bad years over 30. It’s just how you look at it.”
According to Michelle, the issue stemmed from a realization that the couple’s marriage wasn’t “even” at the time, as she noted that she was taking care of the children and her husband was embarking on his political career.
Barack had two terms as US president, which lasted from 2009 to 2017.
“That’s when all the measuring starts,” she continued, while acknowledging that couples often “turn that ire on each other”.
According to Page Six, a source who once worked with the couple said of the rumours their marriage was struggling: They don’t pretend that they have this Camelot relationship. They’re not trying to present that they’re this magical couple.”
While rumors surfaced that the pair were headed for divorce, due to Barack attending high-profile Washington DC events by himself, another insider said this was merely due to the fact Michelle had no interest in going to the US capital.
In December 2022, Michelle said that, for a marriage to work, even in times of struggle or disagreement, you’ve “got to know your person” and “like” who they are.
“I mean, you could be mad at him, but do you still look at him and go: ‘I’m not happy with you, but I respect you. I don’t agree with you, but you’re still a kind, smart person,’” she said, before noting “feelings are going to change over time,” and that that is when couples need to put work into their relationships”.
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