‘Forgiveness is between him and God:’ Families reflect on decade since Charleston church massacre


By Deborah Barfield Berry | USA Today | June 16, 2025

Melvin Graham sat on the right of the arena with other families and listened as Barack Obama read the names of the nine churchgoers who were killed by a White supremacist at Emanuel AME Church in Charleston.

He heard Obama call the name of his younger sister, Cynthia Graham Hurd.

That was emotional enough. But at one point, the president broke out singing “Amazing Grace.’’ Pastors, families, choir members joined in.

“That’s one of those moments when you just wanted to break out and cry,’’ said Graham, who had heard and sung the hymn plenty of times over the years. “Not in the context of having lost a loved one.’’

The shooting 10 years ago at Emanuel AME Church, a historic Black church also known as “Mother Emanuel,” shocked the nation. Members− including Cynthia, a librarian − were at Bible study that June 17 evening when a White man they had welcomed shot nine of them to death. Five others survived.

Some family members called Obama’s presence days later at a funeral service and his rendition of the hymn a poignant moment as the country grappled with the horror of people gunned down at church.

“Even though this happened to Black people in a church … It felt like that sent a message of ‘This could happen to anybody,’ ” said the Rev. Sharon Risher, whose mother, Ethel Lee Lance, was among the Emanuel Nine. “The sympathy from the country was overwhelming.”

The nation was also gripped by some of the families publicly forgiving the shooter. But in the decade since the massacre, the families and others have been troubled by other deadly attacks against people because of their race, ethnicity or faith. And while they continue to demand justice for loved ones they lost, they also call for more efforts to prevent gun violence and tamp down on divisiveness plaguing the country. Families and community leaders hope commemorating the 10th anniversary will lead to more action.

To mark the anniversary, Mother Emanuel will host a series of events, including a service June 17, during what it called “Acts of Amazing Grace Month.’’

The Graham family held a memorial service June 12 for Cynthia at the church, followed by a town hall, ”The Way Forward,” to discuss efforts to heal and take action a decade later.

“It is a moment for us to move from mourning to commemoration,’’ Tonya Matthews, president and CEO of the International African American Museum in Charleston, told USA TODAY. “But that move comes with the real responsibility, and we’ve got to ask: So, what now? We have a moral obligation to do more than remember that moment – we must learn from it and use those lessons of history to inform our future.’’

‘Move from mourning to commemoration’

Across Charleston, there are monuments and tributes to honor the Emanuel Nine, including wooden benches inscribed with their names at a park near the church.

More: ‘We’ve slipped into forgetfulness’: Charleston church shooting survivors demand gun control

There are also scholarships, foundations and memorial gardens named in their honor. A library has been renamed the Cynthia Graham Hurd/St. Andrews Library.

Construction is underway for the Emanuel Nine Memorial at the church. Church officials hope it will provide a space to help with healing.

“They’re being memorialized and they’re being remembered,’’ said Graham, adding that racial attacks still happen. “But we have to put a stop to this.’’

‘Someone is going to act on the lie – again’

Attacks against people because of their faith, race or ethnicity have continued since the shooting at Mother Emanuel. In 2022, 10 Black shoppers were killed by a White supremacist at a grocery store in Buffalo, New York.

Communities have condemned such attacks, but overt racist rhetoric, including against immigrants, has ramped up, said Holly Fisher-Hickman, a history professor at Bowie State University in Maryland.

Beyond Trump administration policies, such as travel bans including from African countries and challenges to birthright citizenship, people are more vocal about attacking other communities, she said.

“It’s worse,” Fisher-Hickman said. “Now we have someone who is blatantly saying it’s OK to do what you feel.”

Graham said national leaders should take the lead to condemn divisive rhetoric. He hopes the commemorations remind people of the harm that can come from it.

“The undercurrent for this to happen is right there,’’ Graham said. “Someone is going to believe the lie and someone is going to act on the lie – again.’’

‘Forgiveness is between him and God’

Risher was as surprised as anyone when some family members, including her own, told Dylann Roof at a court hearing soon after the shooting that they forgave him.

“They just felt compelled, and the words just came out of their mouths,” said Risher, who believes God intervened.

She called the public forgiveness significant because it “set the tone of what was going to go on in Charleston.”

The community rallied.

It took Risher, who also lost a childhood friend and two cousins in the church shooting, more time to forgive. “I’m like, ‘Oh, hell no,’’ she said.

It was two years later during a sermon at an interfaith service in Virginia before Risher said she was moved to publicly forgive Roof.

“God allowed me to work it out in my own time,” said Risher, author of “For Such a Time as This: Hope and Forgiveness after the Charleston Massacre.”

Over the past decade, she has been an advocate for gun violence prevention and abolishing the death penalty.

Last month, families of the Emanuel Nine joined a Zoom call with a victim’s advocate to get an update on Roof’s appeals.

Roof, who was 21 at the time of the shooting, was one of three prisoners on federal death row who were not granted commutations on their sentences by President Joe Biden last December.

Historically, the African American community has given grace to others, Fisher-Hickman said. But some today don’t feel that way.

“Now people are saying, ‘I’m not giving any more grace. Grace has run out,’’ she said.

Though some families of the Emanuel Nine have expressed forgiveness, not everyone has.

Forgiveness is between him and God,’’ Graham said.

“You can’t execute my sister and say, ‘Forgive me,”’ he said. “He planned the day, the time and the moment of my sister’s death.’’

Instead, he said, the family is pressing for lawmakers to adopt stricter gun laws and keep the memory of the Emanuel Nine alive. Graham’s brother, Malcolm, recently released a book, “The Way Forward: Keeping the Faith and Doing the Work Amid Hatred and Violence.’’

“We don’t want to be the angry Black family,” Melvin Graham said. “But we have to stand up for what’s right.’’

Remembering their names

The Rev. Clementa Pickney, 41, senior pastor at Mother Emanuel and state senator

The Rev. Sharonda Coleman-Singleton, 45, associate pastor, high school coach

Cynthia Graham Hurd, 54, longtime librarian, branch manager

Susie Jackson, 87, church trustee, member of the choir

Ethel Lee Lance, 70, sexton, longtime member of Mother Emanuel

DePayne Middleton-Doctor, 49, minister at the church, admissions coordinator, singer

Tywanza Sanders, 26, recent college graduate, aspiring rapper

Daniel Simmons Sr., 74, retired pastor, Army veteran, Purple Heart recipient

Myra Thompson, 59, teacher, counselor, church trustee

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  • One thought on “‘Forgiveness is between him and God:’ Families reflect on decade since Charleston church massacre

    1. We remember this great cloud of nine witnesses who continue to push humanity forward and to raise our collective consciousness of the need to advocate for sensible gun laws and judicial prudence. We remember their names and their unforeseen call to sacrifice life that we might learn the power of forgiveness and peace therein. Ashe.

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